Gender Equality, Contrasting

Nigerian girls want equality, “Shey you Dey Whine me Ni?” Equity maybe, but definitely not equality! It’s true the world is tilting towards embracing equality for all genders but will this notion sit well with us in the long run?

The dating space remains one of contrasting expectations. All over the world, Nigerian men are celebrated for being natural providers and there is a lingering hesitation to let go of certain traditional norms, particularly when it comes to providing/paying bills. Truth be told, this is because most of us grew up seeing men embrace this role well enough. So why disrupt this status quo?

For many men, asking a lady out on a date is often accompanied by the unspoken assumption that they will foot the bill for both parties. Yet, in this era of evolving social dynamics, the situation becomes very funny when some ladies arrive with their friends to a date and expect the guy to pay for all. Some have said they do that for security purposes which is not bad but why not hang out in an open space if you are having doubts about your security.

This brings to mind the case of a guy who was faced with the above dilemma and, in a bid to uphold his values of equality, chose not to cater to the five additional guests, leading to tension and disappointment. Ladies, sometimes we take things to far, why bring a whole five extras? Do you know his financial situation? And to think that the said lady’s friends that came without prior agreement, viewed the act as a breach of dating norms and criticized the man for not being “man enough.” Nevertheless, I have to give the guy his flowers!

Some women who are often at the forefront of advocating for their rights, may find it challenging to reconcile their desires for equality given the comfort and security provided by traditional roles. For instance, “Your money is our money, my money is my money” happens to be one of the favorite quotes for most ladies, especially in this part of the world. How puzzling.

It is crucial to note that gender equality is not an all-or-nothing concept. It involves a journey of gradual changes, understanding, and acceptance. As we navigate this path, open conversations are vital to bridge the gap between tradition and modernity.